Topic 3 Useful Communication Advices

TIPS FOR TALKING WITH YOUR TEEN

Developing open, trusting communication between you and your child is essential to helping him or her avoid alcohol use. If your child feels comfortable talking openly with you, you’ll have a greater chance of guiding him or her toward healthy decisionmaking. Some ways to begin:

  • Encourage conversation. Encourage your child to talk about whatever interests him or her. Listen without interruption and give your child a chance to teach you something new. Your active listening to your child’s enthusiasms paves the way for conversations about topics that concern you.
  • Ask open-ended questions. Encourage your teen to tell you how he or she thinks and feels about the issue you’re discussing. Avoid questions that have a simple “yes” or “no” answer.
  • Control your emotions. If you hear something you don’t like, try not to respond with anger. Instead, take a few deep breaths and acknowledge your feelings in a constructive way.
  • Make every conversation a “win-win” experience. Don’t lecture or try to “score points” on your teen by showing how he or she is wrong. If you show respect for your child’s viewpoint, he or she will be more likely to listen to and respect yours.
  • Offer acceptance. Make sure your teen knows that you appreciate his or her efforts as well as accomplishments. Avoid hurtful teasing or criticism.
  • Understand that your child is growing up. This doesn’t mean a hands-off attitude. But as you guide your child’s behaviour, also make an effort to respect his or her growing need for independence and privacy.
  • Draw the line. Set clear, realistic expectations for your child’s behaviour. Establish appropriate consequences for breaking rules and consistently enforce them.

You are strict parents. You do not allow your daughter to come home later than 9 pm. She is 13 years old and goes to an organised party to visit her older friend from school. She is late and decides not to come home for two days to avoid getting in trouble with you. You are too worried and report her to the police. After two days, your daughter decides to come home anyway. Your daughter comes home and explains what happened, your wife starts crying, screaming and insulting your daughter. The child also starts screaming, you as the father beat her up and forbid her to leave the house.

  • The girl resists and does not comply with the prohibitions.
  • They start running away from school.
  • The violations intensify.
  • Punishments increase, but without results.
  • After many scandals and problems, you give up.
  • The girl repeats the year at school.
  • Has a relationship with a much older man.
  • Almost does not come home.
  • The prognosis is quite pessimistic.
  • Perceives the world around her as hostile.
  • Her self-esteem plummets and the way others perceive her.
  • Is not confident in her ability to make good decisions.
  • Is afraid to make independent choices.